Beyond the Line

As reckless as a fool,
I sometimes do something,
just to see,
how far will I go?

It's good to be a rationalist.
But tiring.
And boring.
And pessimistic.
But not that I want to change.
I can't.

So sometimes, just sometimes,
I let myself go.
Crossing the line just a little bit.
And a little bit more.
And more.
I'm pushing my limit.
I am simply just curious how far I can go.

Because once I thought I knew myself.
Yet I don't.
And I'm eager to see what lies beyond the line.

Do you know such a feeling?
The curiosity. The doubt. The guts. The carefulness yet the recklessness.
It excites me as much as it scares me.

It's not what comes after that scares me.

It's myself.
I'm scared of how far I want to go.